BKJN Pat: Dr. Jekyl and Mr. Hyde?

June 27,2015

I continue to be baffled by the sudden unpredictable emotional shifts I experience on a weekly basis. At any given moment, I feel confident and sure of my ability to meet the challenges the Mastery test presents and just as quickly without warning I am on the verge of backing out of the test, wondering what on earth I was thinking that I could do it.  In all of life's experiences, these emotions are present.  But in spite of my  undeniable evidence that I am doing what I need to do, and sometimes more,  I continue to question that I can keep it up and that I even want to keep it up.  My negative self talk has dogged me through out my martial arts training.  I have made strides in quieting the voice in my head that says I don't measure up, but I haven't extinguished it.  Perhaps I never will.  Perhaps by continuing in spite of my doubts I am doing my best.  I don't give up; I know that about me.  I get discouraged and then I look for ways to accomplish whatever it is I want/need to.  It is difficult to balance life and training.  It would be great if I could take a sabbatical from the rest of my life and only focus on my training.  It would be so much easier, but then I'd be missing some of these lessons I will look back on and value.  The Mastery test is about mastering myself.  Thankfully, I still have time to work on that.

This week:

Push ups: 1,053
Sit ups:     1,010
Running:  6.35 miles
Cycling:   19.5 miles
Classes:  2 + 1 private + 1 BJJ

SBN Terri - WHAT for breakfast?!

  

I had taken a concealed weapon course before and got quite a bit of target practice with my nephew in Utah, but this experience really helped me become more comfortable.  So much of it was getting in the repetition. The drills were very helpful! I had never had to pull my gun out of a holster!  Good practice.  

My left hip and leg has continued to get worse.  A lot of pain in my hip, and numbness in my leg and foot.  The doctor has prescribed a strong anti-inflammatory and I have an appt with physical therapist Monday morning for an evaluation.  He is recommending I try this approach for a month before we take any further action.  I have faith it will!  

The paleo diet generally gives me more sustainable energy.  Sometimes though I am challenged with what to eat.  I used to be able to grab a Luna Bar or instant oatmeal as I ran out the door in the mornings.... but now its more of a challenge.   Egg whites and spinach is good, but I don't always like to cook. I have to be more creative.... sort of ....  I end up eating sliced chicken breast, morning, noon and night. It's easy.  Almonds and raisins are always a treat.  The other morning I had tuna with bell pepper.  Not your typical breakfast foods.... but definitely starts my day off with energy and my mind alert.  

John – Pew Pew

This past week, we were able to train with Master Joey Walker, a very seasoned martial artist with a large array of skills. We learned some defenses against attackers with a large blade like an axe, tomahawk, or machete. We also trained on various gun defenses in various positions (from behind, in front, seated)

On Saturday, we were able to learn some gun fighting skills and drills from Marc Dambrosio, a marine instructor stationed at Marine Corps Mountain Warfare Training Center in Bridgeport. The gun training was a literal blast, and I was able to learn a lot of new drills that I could use to improve my shooting and gun use.

Being a well rounded martial artist and 360 Martial Arts black belt, we need to have a variety of skills to handle a variety of situations. We need to have the ability to walk away from a fight, avoid a fight, talk ourselves out of a fight, or finish a fight. We don’t know where that fight might take place. It could take place standing up, on the ground, against a knife, against a gun, or in a car. So, we train to be adaptable, and I know that I train to run away...fast....very fast. Hee hee!

During last week’s training, I once again found out that, “You don’t know what you don’t know.” So, you must train, and you must train with others with more skill then you. For example, I could target shoot, but I didn’t know how to pull from a holster correctly shoot then reload. I learned a gun draw technique this weekend, and now, I must practice that skill that I did not know.

So, I must go out and Pew pew. Pew pew.

My training for last week follows:

BKJN Pat:There will always be a challenge

This week's challenge for me was our tactical training on Saturday June 20th out in Gardnerville Nevada.  I am someone without much experience with guns and my lack of exposure was a definite handicap.  Try as I might, I couldn't ever get the hang of actually hitting the target.  It didn't matter how large the bulls eye or how short the distance or even what gun I used.  There was no adjustment I could make to correct the problem I was having.  That frustration, combined with the heat and the sun, were more than I had bargained for.  I knew it wouldn't be easy.  I didn't know it would be impossible.  I wanted to quit, but I didn't.  I kept trying even when the results didn't change.  Insanity? Possibly?  It wasn't until we were done for the day that I realized that it was possible that the issue I had with archery might be an issue shooting.  I'm left eye dominant and in order to be at all successful using the bow, I had to use a left handed bow.  It was awkward, because I am right handed, but my accuracy improved immediately when I switched to a left handed bow.  Switching to a left handed gun wasn't an option, but it could be that had I switched to my left hand, I may have stood a better chance.  I couldn't have been more frustrated I'm sure.   I may give that a try when I have an opportunity to shoot a gun again.  And maybe there are other adjustments I can make that will insure greater success.   There will always be challenges; some I will meet with success and some I won't.  The important part is to learn from them.  This week's challenge helped me once again to face that I may have to get a bit creative in order to accomplish what I want to .  Things don't come easily to me, but that doesn't mean I am a failure or that I can't do it.  I just have to figure out how to make it work for me.

In keeping with the idea of not settling, I continued to challenge myself with regard to push ups Wednesday, Thursday, Friday and Saturday.  I just wanted to see what I could do.  Wednesday I did 168 push ups, Thursday 182, Friday 185 +40 during sparring for getting kicked int he heat twice :-( and 167 on Saturday.  I can now do 50 push ups my first set.  That was a goal I had pretty much given up on until this week.  I also challenged myself to increase my distance on my stationary bike and sit ups this week.

This week:
 Push ups:   1,042
Sit ups:          950
Running:      6.34 miles
Cycling:      14.4 miles ( I didn't ride on Saturday due to our early morning start or this number would have shown more of an increase)
Classes:  2 Black Belt, 1 private,  1 BJJ working on flow roll and 1 sparring

John - I'm running to that water tower.

People get pleasure from completing goals. So, people should set many goals and accomplish them to get as much pleasure add possible.

However, people sometimes set such far reaching goals that they give up on the goal along the way to accomplishing them. The goal was just too big.

So, what we should really do is set large goals with easier to hit milestones sprinkled along the way to the larger goal. Every time a little goal is hit, a little pleasure is gained and we are less likely to give up.

When I first started running around my neighborhood for my first degree black belt test,  I saw some water towers on the surrounding hills, and I thought,  "I want to run to that water tower. " I wasn't a very good runner, and I tried to get there, and I failed. It was just too far.

I didn't give up. I set a goal to run a little farther each day.

This is what happened:
I trained to run 1 mile.
A little pleasure was gained.
I trained to run up to 2 miles.
More pleasure was gained.
I hit 3 miles.
Pleasure!
I ran to the tower and back.
Woo hoo! Finally,  I could make it to that water tower without feeling like I would die.

Now,  years later,  I've been to every water tower in my valley. I've been to the far off train tracks, and I've been to the top of most hills in my valley. I now think,  "I want to get to the top of that mountain. "

Here are some pictures from some of my adventures.

For my training,  I feel revived from the RTO, and I'm back to talking 3 classes a week,  and I'm back to running.  Unfortunately,  my bike is still broken, and it needs costly repairs. So,  I was unable to bike. My pushup and crunches are coming along. I can now do 75 push ups on my first set.

BKJN Pat: Don't Settle

June 17, 2015

Yesterday when I was warming up for my private lesson with KJN Paul, he asked me how my push ups were going. What my numbers were? I was momentarily confused: how were my numbers going? I'm doing 150 a day, I thought to myself. I guess I must have had a confused look on my face because he clarified further: he was inquiring about the numbers in my sets 😁.  I said I was doing 40  but could now manage 3 consecutive sets of 40 and thought that represented progress💪🏻.  My usual sets were 40-40-40-30. He asked a few more questions like was I going each time until I couldn't do another 1. I could truthfully answer that I was at least some of the time. He explained that growth came from that added push of doing even one more than you think you can. Then in true KJN Paul style, said no more.

So this morning when I started my push ups, our brief discussion played in my head. I decided to see what would happen. This is how my sets went: 50-42-44-32 for a total of 168. Each set I pushed until I couldn't do another and my push up form really broke down. I had no idea that I could do that. I was willing to settle; I'll try not to let that happen anymore.

A recurring theme for me in this test process is taking it to the next level, changing my expectations of myself, not settling or being satisfied with what has always been.  I think I'm beginning to get it!

SBN Terri: Driven, Disciplined, Determined

These are adjectives I'd like to say apply to me - but these words really describe my husband, Richard.  We have been on "vacation" in Kauai ...for him that means running on the beach and the trail on Sleeping Giant.  We set a goal of recording 100 miles on the running app on my phone.  We reached that goal today.  An average of 8.5 miles a day since we arrived.   I have been hampered by that pesky back problem and sciatica, so I have not done every mile he has, but then again there have been times I've put on miles he hasn't.  He has encouraged me to keep going - he hasn't let me be a slacker.  The deep dry sand adds to the challenge, the steep rocky path offers elements of balance and strength - both have been very good cardio.  With different climatic conditions changes the challenges - rain created torrents of slippery clayey mud, tides are constantly changing the beach.  Sometimes I have felt awful and experienced relentless pain ...but then sometimes I feel on top of the world - having finished the trail run faster than ever before.  Swimming has been such a relief and reward.  I'm feeling better and looking forward to returning to Reno and my training at 360 Martial Arts.  I want to give my husband recognition for his support and, encouragement and being a role model of what it means to be driven, disciplined and determined.

BKJN Pat: I'm going to be a KJN !

June 14, 2015

On Thursday as I was running with my friend and former training partner, Sandy Goff, the reality of this really hit me.  I am going to be a KJN !!!.  Sandy and I trained and tested for our 1st, 2nd, 3rd and 4th degrees together.  And to this day she still has the paper that I made us sign saying after our 4th degree test I (we) were done.  I believed that with all my heart.  And if I'm honest, it's only in the last year that I've been able to even consider that there was a KJN in my future.

KJN Paul and I have a long history.  He signed me up for my introductory lesson when I started with West Coast about 25 years ago.   He loves to tell the story about how when he told me I'd feel so good when I tested for my black belt. I assured him there was no black belt in my future.  I was just taking my introductory class to appease my boys.  They had started training and were relentless about me getting involved.  It was not my intention go beyond a few lessons, maybe.  As it turns out, I tested for my 1st degree before our sons did and as they say, the rest is history.

So what does it mean to be a KJN? KJN, Kwan Jang Nim, means Master Instructor and applies to ranks 5th and above.  Because I've been fortunate in my training to have some very exemplary KJNs, I had difficulty seeing myself as one of them.  As we ran, Sandy and I talked about the KJN's who have been role models for us and what made them so. One of the things that stands out with all of them, and particularly KJN Paul, is how they guide and teach their students.  They hold a vision for us of all that is possible, even when we don't believe it.  It doesn't matter how many times they tell us the same thing, they continue to encourage us and never let us believe we can't accomplish what we are being asked to do, if we are willing to try and give our best effort.  And they take the time to make sense of what it is we're being asked to learn and do.  Patience, creativity, desire to see their students succeed, respect for each student's individuality and  continuing to grow and learn themselves are more attributes of a KJN.  You don't know these things about the KJN's because they tell you... you see it; they live by example.

That's the kind of KJN I want to be.  For me, that means I start now.  I'm going to be a KJN and to do that I have to train and conduct myself as if I already am.  I wasn't ready 12 years ago to take it to the next level.  I wasn't ready 4 years ago to take it to the next level.  I'm ready now.  I'M GOING TO BE A KJN!!!

This week:

Push ups:   900
Sit ups:      920
Running:   6.23 miles
Cycling:     14.1 miles
Classes:  2 Black Belt,  1 private
Working on my form

John – Baby needs a new pair of shoes

The last week, I was still recovering from running the RTO. So, my training was lighter than normal. When you run at race pace, you cause a lot more strain on your body then on a normal run.

I did have a couple casualties after the RTO. One casualty was my running shoes. A good pair of running shoes can last me for about 250 to 300 miles or approximately 6 months (Give or take). I never wear new shoes to a race because bad things can happen. The shoe might not fit properly. It could give you blisters, or it could slip on your feet. So, the shoes I wore were about 5 months old, and they did fine. However, they now need to be retired. Below is a picture of my new shoes.

New Balance Leadville MT1210 - My Favorite Trail Shoes

The other casualty of the race was one of my toes. The toenail is purple, and it was probably caused because of slipping in my older shoes. See the picture below.

My longest and middle toes on my right foot.

I might lose that toenail. Again. Yes, again.

Also, if you look at the other toe, you can see that the nail is almost looking normal after falling off and growing back. I know, “Gross!”

I view a lot of online material on running, martial arts, and shooting, and a lot of them have funny lists that say, “You know you're a <blank> when <blank>”

Below are a few running list items I like.

You know you’re a runner when:

·        You have more running shoes then other kind of shoes.

·        You say, “There are other kind of shoes?!”

·        Your Sundays are earlier then you’re Mondays.

·        You know exactly how far a mile is from your house in every direction.

·        You’re missing toenails are a badge of honor.

And, here’s my own list for a martial artists.

You know you’re a martial artist when:

·        You have weapons laying all around your house and you know all of their names. Bo Staves, Kamas, Kali Sticks, Bokkens, Kendo Sticks, Bat'leth (hee hee)

·        You have martial arts uniforms in almost every color of the rainbow. White, Red, Black, Blue, Red/Black

·        You have more boxing gloves and mma gloves then winter gloves.

·        You have more martial arts shirts then any other types of shirts.

·        You say, “There are other types of shirts?!”

·        You know what it feels like when a bone breaks on you or an opponent. (Ouch!)

·        You have been in positions or put people in positions that would make you blush if your significant other was in the room.

My training for last week follows:

  

Wesley - Week of June 1st

This week I didn't get an opportunity to hit the gym.  I was busy starting a new job so it was difficult to figure out what my schedule would be.  In regards to my diet, I've been pretty inconsistent with it.  I need start eating cleaner and counting my calories.  In regards to my knees, it's still hurting so I started wearing a knee brace to help with the running.

In term of my other preparation, I need to start being consistent with stretching and working on my weapons routine.  I would like to use nunchucks however I keep hurting myself on it and its getting frustrating.  Practice makes perfect.

Summary for the week:
Running 9 Miles
Biking 10 miles
Push Ups 1000
Sit Ups 1000

BKJN Pat: Keep on keepin on

June 8, 2015

How do you get up everyday, knowing that on top of everything else the day holds, you have to complete 150 push ups, 150 sit ups, and bike or run 3 miles ?  And how do you do it until October?  In spite of my best efforts, there are days when I wonder how that is possible and I'm sure it's not.  Yet each morning I get up, and by choice complete those tasks before 7 am.  One day at a time is the secret.  Being totally present in the moment and letting the future take care of itself.

On May 30, I celebrated being able to do 3 consecutive sets of 40 push ups.  I have set a goal of being able to do 50 in one set.  That goal remains illusive.  But all last week, I was able to do 3 consecutive sets of 40 each morning and finish with a set of 30. That felt good and was encouraging.   It must mean I'm getting stronger; making progress. Sometimes that's hard to see,too.

I've been so focused on getting the conditioning parts that some of the other aspects of preparation have been put on hold.  This coming week that is going to change: I'm adding working on my flow roll pattern.  I'm beginning to think about what my gun/stick and knife demonstration will look like and will be making arrangements to get some additional training for the weapon I want to use in my form.  One step at a time. 

I will admit that while there are many aspects of my life in which I'm very disciplined, when it comes to making a commitment to me to do a particular thing, I start out great and then loose my commitment because it is just to hard to keep it up and other things become more important.  That hasn't been the case with this training.  I am important and what I need to do is important.  So if anyone in my life feels slighted, I apologize. It won't be this way forever.  This is my time to do something that is a once in a life time and I want to give it my best.  Please understand.

June 1-6 2015
Push ups:  900
Sit ups:      900
Running: 6.61 miles 
Cycling:  14.2 miles
Classes: 2 Black belt , 1 private

Terri - Setbacks, Recoveries and Attitude

The last week in May was exciting and exhilarating - many factors contributing to that - Principally - I really started feeling better.  I could participate better in class, kick without pain, getting my 150 push ups and sit ups done.  Enjoying sparring on Friday nights.

An unrelated activity presented itself, I was asked if I could participate on a team for the Reno Tahoe Odyssey - one of the team members had become ill - Could I do it?  Oh man, this was something I had wanted to do some day.....  I was just being asked to do one leg - they'd cover the other two.... I ended up doing two, 4.8 mile legs, the second was at sunrise - loved it, I DID it!  I did it without pain! It was a great experience -

I was feeling so good - I went to the gym added to the workout, went home worked in the yard and my back sparked with a little pain. Gasp - What had I done!  All my recovery efforts over the last 3 months - gone!? Yes - its true, I have continued to be in pain - my lower back and sciatic nerve has limited everything I do.  Noooooo!

Crazy as it is .... It was at this point in time, my husband and I had planned our vacation to Kauai - bought it & paid for it last December.  I thought for sure this would compliment my training and I'd come back  a total studette!  But instead, the timing has been fortunate to work on recovery.  I was able to start focusing on healing on Wednesday after the hellish trip here.... My techniques seem to be helping.  Minimal stress.  Walking barefoot on the beach, in the waves.  Swimming in the ocean and swimming in the pool.  Carefully hiking.  Applying ice packs.  Applying Deep Blue Rub (essential oils).  Taking lots of ibuprofen.  Reading. Practicing my ukulele.  Reaching to touch the natural order of things and my soul.

I have been mentally practicing martial arts techniques.  Sometimes that can help to affix it to my brain.  I prefer physical practice - but since I can't at this time, mentally will have to do.

Wesley - Week of May 25th

Here's a quick summary of my training.  Haven't been able to run a lot as my knees have been acting up, so for now I'm sticking to biking.

Summary for the week:

Running 5 miles
Biking 17 miles
Push Ups 600
Sit Ups 475
Weights (Reps) 324
Weights (Lbs) 3965