July 26, 2015
Without the stress of wondering what would happen if I got stuck in a cave, freaked out, or otherwise embarrassed myself, this week was relatively uneventful. When I think about our Moaning Cavern experience, I am grateful for that whole experience. It has given me a new appreciation for what I am capable of doing and confidence that I am up to the challenges that will present themselves. I don't think I'll completely be able to give up my hesitancy about trying new things that aren't on my list of things I feel I have to do for my life to be complete ( I learned during the drive to the caverns that my speaking my doubts and lack of enthusiasm provides a certain amount of entertainment for my fellow participants) but I do think some of the head noise will quiet.
Monday this week was the first day I chose not to do any of my push ups, sit ups or bicycling since starting my regiment in January. I was achy and tired and decided I could give myself another day of rest. It was hard to make that okay. I finally rationalized that since I started three months ahead of schedule, I was in no way shirking my responsibilities or commitment. I did get in 50 push ups that day however due to a partner challenge during Black Belt class. We had to try to out last our partner. I wasn't watching when my partner stopped until I got to 50.
A while back, I set a goal to be able to do one set of 50 push ups. I don't know why that was important, but it was. When I could not consistently meet that goal, I decided it wasn't really that important. It was only a number. I stopped trying and was content to just get my 150 done in whatever combination each day would bring. For the past two weeks, I have consistently been able to do 4 consecutive sets of 50 push ups a day. I feel no need to go beyond that, and am happy to check that off my list. I thought I had let go of that goal, but apparently I hadn't. Goes to show you how powerful our thoughts really are and how careful we need to be about what we focus and think about.
This week:
Push- ups: 1,070
Sit-ups: 1,000
Bicycling: 24.9 miles
Running : Couldn't run this week because my husband was out of town and I wasn't about to drag 6 kids out early in the morning for a run .
Classes: 2 Black Belt classes, two private lessons
Sunday, July 26, 2015
Thursday, July 23, 2015
SBN Terri : Don't spend your time stressing over what you have no control over!
I was telling a friend about our amazing experience exploring Moaning Cavern last weekend. I did admit to her that when I was in some of those tight spaces, squeezing through; the thought of how much earth was on top of me, and how vulnerable I was, would try to invade my mind. But, I pushed those thoughts away. There was no point in worrying about it.
My friend was so impressed with that, she was going to write it down. She saw how that could be applied to many things in life. We get so wound up, stressing over the "what if's". And so often these are things we have absolutely no control over.
I've been thinking a lot about martial arts, why I'm here, what it means to me, why I continue to train - at least try given my physical limitations right now. When I started, I never dreamed I'd still be doing this after 19 years. More to come on these thoughts!!
I've been continuing physical therapy, doing push ups, riding my bike. I'm thrilled to be working more with Virgil on kali. I may not be able to do much kicking or rolling, but develop more skills with knives, sticks and gun disarms.
If the earth shifted, well, I wouldn't have to think about it very long.
Sunday, July 19, 2015
SBN John – Entering the Bat Cave
Our special training for the
last week was to perform a 165 foot rappel into Moaning Cavern. For most of the
rappel, we were dangling in the air above the beautiful cave system with only
the support of the climbing room. It was scary and exhilarating.
Then, we spent
3 and a half hours crawling and sliding through the cave system. We went
through various caves and tunnels with real fun names like the “meat grinder”, the
“pancake room”, the “roach motel”, and “godzilla’s nostril”. I needed to crawl,
twist, and bend my body in various positions to get through the tunnels. I had
a blast and I was ready to move in and setup my "BAT CAVE!" because like I told our guide, "I'm Batman."
I also found an old bottle
opener that someone must have lost in the cave. I gave it to our guide so he
could dispose of it. If it wasn’t already in the cave, it shouldn’t be in the
cave. Except for the bones. I we found those, they needed to stay in the cave. Many
creatures have fallen into the cave and died, and the oldest set of human bones
found there were dated to be 12,000 years old.
For my other training,
it’s been hard to get run and/or bike in the last few weeks. It was too hot,
too late, too rainy, or there was too much lightning. Also, my mountain bike is
broken. My rear derailleur broker off, the chain snapped and the cable attached
to the rear derailleur snapped. It’s an expensive mountain bike. So, it will be
an expensive fix. I still want to run in the Reno 10 Miler in August. So, it’s
frustrating to miss even a single run.
Below are my
training numbers:
Even when I believe I can't, I can !
July 19,2015
It's been no secret that I wasn't looking forward to this weekend's Mastery Test challenge: Moaning Cavern. This challenge involved a 200 foot repel into an open cavern, 165 feet of which was a free repel, dangling from a rope and harness. The rest of this adventure was spelunking through caves underground from the cavern we repelled into. While I wasn't thrilled or excited about the prospect, I knew I would do it. I wasn't too worried about the repel; it was the spelunking. I was pretty sure I was claustrophobic. The basis for that was my dislike of narrow tunnels on water slides and my inability as a child to go into the small space between the walls in a friend's house. As an adult, I'd really had no opportunity to test it out. Having gone through a couple of MRI's I thought I might not be as claustrophobic as I thought, but I wasn't entirely sure.
I'm happy to report that the repelling was great. There was one rather tense moment of stepping off the first ledge to begin a short free repel, but once that was done, the rest was really quite amazing. I made it a point to keep my eyes level with where I was hanging in the cavern so the distance down wasn't really a concern. As I lowered myself, the part of the cavern I was looking at lowered so I wasn't worried about how high up I was.
Much to my surprise, I didn't freak out in the tight spaces in the caves. And some of the spaces were really tight. We crawled through on our bellies, or backs, head first at times, feet first at others, with not much wiggle room. Our guide Tim kept reminding us that if at anytime we felt uncomfortable, we needed to let him know. Except for getting tired at times, the narrow spaces didn't scare me. I will say that at one point I was ready to have the tour end. Not because I was freaking out, but because I was tired. There are points for early exit, but once you're passed that, there is no turning back.
The final task was to climb up a 40 ' chimney within the cavern floor and slide down the face of one of the walls of the main cavern. By the time we got to that part, I was exhausted. I stood at the base of the chimney, looked up and told KJN Paul I didn't think I could do it. It required climbing using foot and hand holds to pull me up. There was a rope that could be used with hands or feet, but that seemed a bit too precarious for me. KJN Paul kept assuring me that I'd find a way; I keep assuring him I wouldn't. My initial fear was slipping and falling; there was no safety rope. My other fear was finding foot holds and hand holds at manageable spacing. Tim had assured us these were readily available and easy to find but I wasn't finding any. After stepping up on the first foot hold, it took some time to muscle the courage for the next step. Everything seemed out of reach and I worried that I was so tired I couldn't hold on and pull myself up. And the rocks were slippery. KJN quietly and patiently assured me I would find my way, but to do so I had to move. I tried using the rope as a ladder and I was able to move another step higher, all the while telling myself I couldn't do this. There really was no way out but to go up, and at some point I realized the space was small enough that I could lean my back against the rocks and give myself some extra support. The chatter in my head stopped and I focused on climbing. About that time the hand and foot holds did seem to be closer together and I was able to make my way up. As in the cavern, I tried to keep my eyes level with where I actually was rather than looking down or up. When I could see the light through the top of the hole and could hear familiar voices, I knew I would make it. That was the most incredible feeling in the world. What had seemed so impossible, really wasn't. The last part was to slide down a wall in the main cavern. For this portion a safety rope was tied around my waist and I held on to a knotted rope to lower myself. I couldn't believe I had done it.
I didn't think I'd say this either: I'm really glad I did this. It was an amazing experience on many levels.
This week I went to one private lesson. I kept up with all my push ups ( 900) and rode my bicycle rather than running (24.7 miles). The only other thing I was short on was sit ups( 830).
It's been no secret that I wasn't looking forward to this weekend's Mastery Test challenge: Moaning Cavern. This challenge involved a 200 foot repel into an open cavern, 165 feet of which was a free repel, dangling from a rope and harness. The rest of this adventure was spelunking through caves underground from the cavern we repelled into. While I wasn't thrilled or excited about the prospect, I knew I would do it. I wasn't too worried about the repel; it was the spelunking. I was pretty sure I was claustrophobic. The basis for that was my dislike of narrow tunnels on water slides and my inability as a child to go into the small space between the walls in a friend's house. As an adult, I'd really had no opportunity to test it out. Having gone through a couple of MRI's I thought I might not be as claustrophobic as I thought, but I wasn't entirely sure.
I'm happy to report that the repelling was great. There was one rather tense moment of stepping off the first ledge to begin a short free repel, but once that was done, the rest was really quite amazing. I made it a point to keep my eyes level with where I was hanging in the cavern so the distance down wasn't really a concern. As I lowered myself, the part of the cavern I was looking at lowered so I wasn't worried about how high up I was.
Much to my surprise, I didn't freak out in the tight spaces in the caves. And some of the spaces were really tight. We crawled through on our bellies, or backs, head first at times, feet first at others, with not much wiggle room. Our guide Tim kept reminding us that if at anytime we felt uncomfortable, we needed to let him know. Except for getting tired at times, the narrow spaces didn't scare me. I will say that at one point I was ready to have the tour end. Not because I was freaking out, but because I was tired. There are points for early exit, but once you're passed that, there is no turning back.
The final task was to climb up a 40 ' chimney within the cavern floor and slide down the face of one of the walls of the main cavern. By the time we got to that part, I was exhausted. I stood at the base of the chimney, looked up and told KJN Paul I didn't think I could do it. It required climbing using foot and hand holds to pull me up. There was a rope that could be used with hands or feet, but that seemed a bit too precarious for me. KJN Paul kept assuring me that I'd find a way; I keep assuring him I wouldn't. My initial fear was slipping and falling; there was no safety rope. My other fear was finding foot holds and hand holds at manageable spacing. Tim had assured us these were readily available and easy to find but I wasn't finding any. After stepping up on the first foot hold, it took some time to muscle the courage for the next step. Everything seemed out of reach and I worried that I was so tired I couldn't hold on and pull myself up. And the rocks were slippery. KJN quietly and patiently assured me I would find my way, but to do so I had to move. I tried using the rope as a ladder and I was able to move another step higher, all the while telling myself I couldn't do this. There really was no way out but to go up, and at some point I realized the space was small enough that I could lean my back against the rocks and give myself some extra support. The chatter in my head stopped and I focused on climbing. About that time the hand and foot holds did seem to be closer together and I was able to make my way up. As in the cavern, I tried to keep my eyes level with where I actually was rather than looking down or up. When I could see the light through the top of the hole and could hear familiar voices, I knew I would make it. That was the most incredible feeling in the world. What had seemed so impossible, really wasn't. The last part was to slide down a wall in the main cavern. For this portion a safety rope was tied around my waist and I held on to a knotted rope to lower myself. I couldn't believe I had done it.
I didn't think I'd say this either: I'm really glad I did this. It was an amazing experience on many levels.
This week I went to one private lesson. I kept up with all my push ups ( 900) and rode my bicycle rather than running (24.7 miles). The only other thing I was short on was sit ups( 830).
Sunday, July 12, 2015
BKJN Pat: Accepting who I am
July 12, 2015
KJN Paul has stressed repeatedly that our Mastery Test is really about mastering ourselves: our fears, our head games, our doubts and letting go of our self-limiting beliefs. I've trained for 4 other black belt tests and this by far has presented me with the greatest challenges. We don't have specific curriculum we have to learn, but are being asked to show what we know. Yes we have guidelines, specific components, but how those are demonstrated is totally up to each one of us. This is both freeing and frightening. We also have many challenges through Mastery Team activities. The one coming up is repelling at Moaning Caverns.
Thankfully because of a previous repelling experience with this same group of people, I am not going into this one blind. However, there is still a large element of challenge there. The fact that I do not feel excited and enthusiastic about this adventure is part of that. I feel like the official team party pooper because try as I might I can't get excited about doing this. I've come face to face with my Eeyore and finding acceptance for that part of me has been my challenge this week. I am not someone who seeks out adrenaline rushes. I don't like skiing black diamonds, going up steel hills on ATV's, speeding, jumping off of rocks into water, climbing up high, or ropes course adventures. I don't feel the need for heart racing adventures. They are not on my bucket list. I've done them, but they leave me exhausted. Am I ever sorry I did them? No, not even once. Did I need to do them to make my life complete? No, at the end of my life, these would not be things I'd regret not doing. Would I do them again? Probably not.
It took most of this week, but I am finally able to be okay with the fact that these things don't excite me and that my feeling about them is that I just have to get through it. Because even though I may not like doing them, I do them when that is what is expected of me. I'd like to be more at ease about these kinds of activities, but that's not who I am and at this stage in the game, that's not likely to change. I have learned over the years that I have what it takes to meet the challenges life brings me; it will be no different with this. I'm not a quitter; I may not be the one jumping up and down saying "pick me" "let me" "I'll go first", but when I'm asked to show up, I do.
This week July 6-11, 2015
Push ups: 1,064. I continue to challenge myself each day to see how many more I can do. This week my top daily number was 192
Sit ups: 980
Running: 3.45 miles
Cycling: 24.6 miles
Stay tuned next Sunday to hear all about Moaning Cavern !
KJN Paul has stressed repeatedly that our Mastery Test is really about mastering ourselves: our fears, our head games, our doubts and letting go of our self-limiting beliefs. I've trained for 4 other black belt tests and this by far has presented me with the greatest challenges. We don't have specific curriculum we have to learn, but are being asked to show what we know. Yes we have guidelines, specific components, but how those are demonstrated is totally up to each one of us. This is both freeing and frightening. We also have many challenges through Mastery Team activities. The one coming up is repelling at Moaning Caverns.
Thankfully because of a previous repelling experience with this same group of people, I am not going into this one blind. However, there is still a large element of challenge there. The fact that I do not feel excited and enthusiastic about this adventure is part of that. I feel like the official team party pooper because try as I might I can't get excited about doing this. I've come face to face with my Eeyore and finding acceptance for that part of me has been my challenge this week. I am not someone who seeks out adrenaline rushes. I don't like skiing black diamonds, going up steel hills on ATV's, speeding, jumping off of rocks into water, climbing up high, or ropes course adventures. I don't feel the need for heart racing adventures. They are not on my bucket list. I've done them, but they leave me exhausted. Am I ever sorry I did them? No, not even once. Did I need to do them to make my life complete? No, at the end of my life, these would not be things I'd regret not doing. Would I do them again? Probably not.
It took most of this week, but I am finally able to be okay with the fact that these things don't excite me and that my feeling about them is that I just have to get through it. Because even though I may not like doing them, I do them when that is what is expected of me. I'd like to be more at ease about these kinds of activities, but that's not who I am and at this stage in the game, that's not likely to change. I have learned over the years that I have what it takes to meet the challenges life brings me; it will be no different with this. I'm not a quitter; I may not be the one jumping up and down saying "pick me" "let me" "I'll go first", but when I'm asked to show up, I do.
This week July 6-11, 2015
Push ups: 1,064. I continue to challenge myself each day to see how many more I can do. This week my top daily number was 192
Sit ups: 980
Running: 3.45 miles
Cycling: 24.6 miles
Stay tuned next Sunday to hear all about Moaning Cavern !
SBN Terri - You just can't rush healing!!!
Physical Therapy has been helping.... guiding me as to what I should and should not do. The pressure on the sciatic nerve causes pain that radiates down my left leg, especially my calf muscle! I'm not waking up in the middle of the night in pain any more, so that is a good sign. I am able to resume doing push-ups and riding my bicycle at least 3 miles a day. It is funny what aggravates it and what doesn't. It is very tiring to contend with it....
Ah! But to focus on the good things..... I have been working on what I can - more on knife and gun disarms - bo staff form.... fighting form... Refining the details. I love working with our students - it takes the pain away!!
Eating a paleo diet is great for me... but clearly, I still eat too many calories, especially now that I am not burning as many. I keep trying.
I am often forced to stop and rest, relax, ice my lower back, close my eyes, and breathe deeply. A fundamental practice I should incorporate into my life to alleviate stress. Its going to be a busy time with my work.... I must keep the stress from overtaking me.
Ah! But to focus on the good things..... I have been working on what I can - more on knife and gun disarms - bo staff form.... fighting form... Refining the details. I love working with our students - it takes the pain away!!
Eating a paleo diet is great for me... but clearly, I still eat too many calories, especially now that I am not burning as many. I keep trying.
I am often forced to stop and rest, relax, ice my lower back, close my eyes, and breathe deeply. A fundamental practice I should incorporate into my life to alleviate stress. Its going to be a busy time with my work.... I must keep the stress from overtaking me.
Monday, July 6, 2015
Wesley Week of July 29th
Well, I think I missed a week or two in updating this blog. It's been so hectic with my life it's hard to just get a moment to breath. I started a new job in June so a lot of my mental focus has been ensuring that the transition to this job goes well. In addition, trying to ensure I meet my commitment to the 360 MA business, physical training, curriculum, my family and my sanity. One thing I realize is that I need to put in more reps in the classroom in terms of curriculum. There's so much that I need a refresher in, especially knives and sticks.
One of the things that I'm trying to focus on is the Master's mindset. KJN Paul sent out an email regarding the Master's mindset, which essentially means beyond your physical ability, you should have your state of mind at a higher level, meet new challenges and face new fears. Well, KJN Paul has pretty much force me to do things that I'm not comfortable with, such as the recent survival training. If anyone knows me, I'm pretty much a city boy. Need my daily showers, bed and home cooked meals. One of my goal is to do something that gets me out of my comfort level on my own, without something telling me I have to. This will be a great challenge. Stay tune as I figure what it will be.
In terms of physical training, I've been doing the 150 pushups/sit-ups daily and biking 6 miles daily, so I feel I'm good in that arena. Also I've been hitting the gym 3 times a week. Only issue is I need to consume more calories so not to waste away and lose strength.
That's all for now, 'til next time.
SBN Wes
Sunday, July 5, 2015
BKJN Pat: A different kind of week
This week, because of the 4th of July holiday and Patty, our daughter-in-law having the week off, our family went camping at Blue Lakes. Most of them left last Sunday; I wasn't able to leave until Thursday evening because two of the boys were in summer school. That meant that Friday and Saturday I wouldn't be home to do my usual routine of push ups, sit ups and cycling for two of the required 6 days. It seemed a bit strange to not be doing those things; part of me welcomed the break; part of me worries how I'll ever get motivated to start again tomorrow. This is the first time since January that I've allowed myself an additional two days off. It's pretty easy to stop a routine; I'm hoping my discipline up until this point will make it easy to resume again. I won't really know until tomorrow. It's harder than I imagined, no that's not really true; its as hard as I imagined it would be to keep going all these months... and there are still 4 months to go.
This month our Mastery Training takes us to Moaning Caverns: repelling, 200 feet in the dark, climbing around in caves. I can say with all honesty that this training has given me opportunities to do things I never would think about doing. I'm hoping for this one, I'll be able to see it for the adventure it is and just go for it !
This weeks' numbers will be a bit less than usual. That has to be okay because that's what is. I'm adding another aspect of training to what I'm doing already. In addition to black belt class time, working on flow roll patterns with Jessi, private lessons with KJN Paul, SBN Terri and I will begin working with Virgil to get some training with stick, knife and gun ( I hope; stick and knife for sure; hoping for gun as well) I seem to have a great deal of difficulty with the weapons portion of training. This will be an opportunity to work some of that out. I wonder how one adds anymore things to an already full schedule and yet we are.
This week 6/29-7/2/15:
Push ups: 705 ( I can now do at least 3 consecutive sets of 50; I had two personal bests this week: 4 consecutive sets of 50 on Monday 6/29 and a first set of 55 on 7/2.)
Sit ups: 630
Running: 6.51 miles
Cycle: 9.9 miles
Classes: BB Class 2, private lesson, noon class
This month our Mastery Training takes us to Moaning Caverns: repelling, 200 feet in the dark, climbing around in caves. I can say with all honesty that this training has given me opportunities to do things I never would think about doing. I'm hoping for this one, I'll be able to see it for the adventure it is and just go for it !
This weeks' numbers will be a bit less than usual. That has to be okay because that's what is. I'm adding another aspect of training to what I'm doing already. In addition to black belt class time, working on flow roll patterns with Jessi, private lessons with KJN Paul, SBN Terri and I will begin working with Virgil to get some training with stick, knife and gun ( I hope; stick and knife for sure; hoping for gun as well) I seem to have a great deal of difficulty with the weapons portion of training. This will be an opportunity to work some of that out. I wonder how one adds anymore things to an already full schedule and yet we are.
This week 6/29-7/2/15:
Push ups: 705 ( I can now do at least 3 consecutive sets of 50; I had two personal bests this week: 4 consecutive sets of 50 on Monday 6/29 and a first set of 55 on 7/2.)
Sit ups: 630
Running: 6.51 miles
Cycle: 9.9 miles
Classes: BB Class 2, private lesson, noon class
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