August 30, 2015
This was a post on my Facebook page today. It seems to sum up my Mastery Test journey so well that I felt I should share it:
"One day she finally grasped that unexpected things were always going to happen in life. And with that she realized the only control she had was how she chose to handle them. So she made the decision to survive using courage, humor and grace. She was the queen of her own life and the choice was hers."
Lupytha Hermin
We have been given many opportunities during this Mastery Test that have challenged us on many levels. I've definitely been taken out of my comfort zone: survival trip, tactical training, repelling and spelunking do not appear on my bucket list of things I need to do for my life to be complete. (In truth, I don't really have a bucket list, but I think you know what I mean.) Those things I expected to be challenging. It's the day to day pitfalls, I wasn't prepared for. Or at least not with the frequency with which they arose. I'm beginning, at last, to feel I have a better grip on them. I have to stay focused in the moment, on what I'm doing in the here and now rather than what comes next. Being present is really the only way to live life fully, yet its hard to do. I am not typically a big picture person and in this instance that serves me well. I can manage the parts and the parts will insure that the whole is complete. If I focus on the whole, I'm lost; it's too big and too impossible.
Before I know it, the actual test weekend will be here. The thought of that makes me a bit nervous, excited, scared and relieved. I intend to be strong and confident and courageously face what that weekend brings. I know that the real test has been all that has come before, the big challenges and the small. I'm doing my Mastery Test even as I write this.
Training 8/24-8/30/2015
Push ups: 1,000
Sit ups: 1,000
Running: 6.43 miles
Cycling: 14.2 miles
Classes: 2 Black Belt, 2 private, 2 stick
Mastery Event: Habitat for Humanity
This weeks push ups and sit ups bring my grand totals from April 2015 to the present to: 19,734 push ups
19, 175 sit ups. Since the first of the year: 25,967 push ups and 25,408 sit ups.
Sunday, August 30, 2015
Thursday, August 27, 2015
BKJN Pat : You just never know; staying open to the possibilities
August 27, 2015
Last night I went to bed with every part of me aching to some degree or another. I slept pretty well considering that but the 6 am alarm came way too soon. I briefly considered staying in bed and doing my push ups and sit ups later in the day as just the thought of doing them almost brought me to tears. Instead, I considered that maybe it wouldn't be as bad as I thought. So I got dressed and went downstairs to get started. There was some comfort in remembering that today I meet Sandy to run at Rancho San Rafael rather than riding my bike. What that really represented was less time this morning, not necessarily an easier task.
I started the dryer( one of the boys had laundry that needed finishing up) and started my push ups. In between sets I read Facebook posts and checked on the dryer and before I knew it, my 200 push ups were done. I was somewhat pleased to realize that the last set of 50 felt pretty easy. Then on to sit ups and I was done about 6:45 which left me some quiet time before the troops ( 4 boys) arrived downstairs to start the morning. As soon as they were off to school, I was on my way to the park.
While I was somewhat encouraged by the ease of the first part of my morning routine, the run remained a bit daunting. During our last run on Monday, my calves ached and one foot went numb and this was the day of the long uphill run. As quickly as I lamented all those things, I reminded myself that there was always the possibility that it wouldn't be too bad. Yes it took about the same amount of time for my lungs to accept that I was running up hill, but the run itself felt pretty good. I had commented to Sandy at the beginning that I wondered if the run would ever get easier. As we rounded the pond on the last leg of the run, I realized it actually was easier today. I forgot to set my Fitbit to record distance and time, but I didn't really need that to know it was better today than it had been.
Negative thoughts are as much a part of us as the positive ones. Silly to deny them; but they don't have to own me or control me. I can let them go and open the door to other possibilities. A good lesson for today .
Last night I went to bed with every part of me aching to some degree or another. I slept pretty well considering that but the 6 am alarm came way too soon. I briefly considered staying in bed and doing my push ups and sit ups later in the day as just the thought of doing them almost brought me to tears. Instead, I considered that maybe it wouldn't be as bad as I thought. So I got dressed and went downstairs to get started. There was some comfort in remembering that today I meet Sandy to run at Rancho San Rafael rather than riding my bike. What that really represented was less time this morning, not necessarily an easier task.
I started the dryer( one of the boys had laundry that needed finishing up) and started my push ups. In between sets I read Facebook posts and checked on the dryer and before I knew it, my 200 push ups were done. I was somewhat pleased to realize that the last set of 50 felt pretty easy. Then on to sit ups and I was done about 6:45 which left me some quiet time before the troops ( 4 boys) arrived downstairs to start the morning. As soon as they were off to school, I was on my way to the park.
While I was somewhat encouraged by the ease of the first part of my morning routine, the run remained a bit daunting. During our last run on Monday, my calves ached and one foot went numb and this was the day of the long uphill run. As quickly as I lamented all those things, I reminded myself that there was always the possibility that it wouldn't be too bad. Yes it took about the same amount of time for my lungs to accept that I was running up hill, but the run itself felt pretty good. I had commented to Sandy at the beginning that I wondered if the run would ever get easier. As we rounded the pond on the last leg of the run, I realized it actually was easier today. I forgot to set my Fitbit to record distance and time, but I didn't really need that to know it was better today than it had been.
Negative thoughts are as much a part of us as the positive ones. Silly to deny them; but they don't have to own me or control me. I can let them go and open the door to other possibilities. A good lesson for today .
Sunday, August 23, 2015
BKJN Pat: Mouth, words, thoughts, my reality
August 23, 2015
We've all heard the childhood chant: "Sticks and stones will break my bones, but words will never hurt me". As a child I didn't question that. As an adult, and hopefully a fully evolving human being, I know that words can hurt in ways we never truly heal from. Words are powerful and the ones we use make an impression on those around us and on ourselves. This week, I had yet another lesson about how my words, my own words, make me or break me.
This week's lesson was about the connection between what comes out of my mouth and what thoughts ramble around in my head. I realized that once words are out of my mouth, they trip a cycle of thoughts in my head that can defeat me more than anything else ever can. They are my words; my thoughts.
I have struggled throughout my life, to see my own value, to appreciate who I am and all that I am capable of. I am my own worst critic and I cut me very little slack. It's very easy for me to find fault in myself and all the ways I don't measure up. That really came home to me this week. My first response, the words out of my mouth, when asked to do something in our martial arts class is "I can't, or some under my breath mumbling about how I'll just screw up. Once those words are out, they rule. And while I might not be the colossal failure I was prepared to be, it is a very uncomfortable place for me to be. From there, I don't see anything positive or possible.
My real life experiences, don't support this view I take. I have many more successes than failures. If I try to do something, I generally can and do. Clearly, my thoughts patterns are well ingrained and it wasn't going to be easy to stop a life long habit. Yet when I reached the point of wanting to give up on this test, I knew things had to change. When I could clearly see the connection between what came out of my mouth and the thoughts that followed, I understood that I needed to stop those self defeating words. Because when I didn't say those words, my head stayed quiet and the thoughts didn't take over. I resolved to consciously choose a different response. For example, on Monday KJN asked SBN Terri and I to demonstrate a technique. In the past I would have grumbled some disparaging remark about how I couldn't do that, but this time I said "we'd be happy to". It completely changed everything about the demonstration. I resolved to make an effort to not let comments come out of my mouth that are not supportive and complementary. If I do, I try to replace that with something less negative, if I can't go totally positive. It was a small thing really, but it has had big benefits. And it's been surprisingly easy to curb my mouth which in turn quiets all the things that play in my head and keep me from appreciating the truth of who I am. It's been a more peaceful productive week. It is something I will have to work at, but the ease with which I could begin to make changes, gives me hope that this will be something I one day leave behind.
This Saturday was our first Saturday special training. I wasn't sure what we'd be in for. It's been a lot of years since I was more than a support person during training. Saturday morning I didn't do my push ups or sit ups or ride my bike. I was fairly certain there would be a run involved Saturday morning and probably some push ups, etc. Well there weren't any push ups or sit ups, but the training was pretty much non stop for the first hour and then a run. We did more repetitions than I typically get in class time and I came away with a renewed sense of how training has to change to make my performance during the test something I'll be proud of. I was exhausted when we were done and thankful that I hadn't waited to get started on my conditioning. Even with all I've been doing, it was a challenge... as it should be.
This weeks training: August 17-22, 2015
This week 4/1- present 1/3 - 3/31 Grand total ( so far)
Push ups: 1,000 18,734 6,233 24,967
Sit ups: 1,000 18,175 6,233 24,408
Running: 9.44 miles
Bicycling: 14.5 miles
Classes: 2 Black Belt, 2 private, 2 stick , and Saturday Special training. By all counts a full week.
SBN TERRI: Two steps forward, one slide back
I have been going to physical therapy since the middle of June. Sometimes I feel like I am getting better, other times I feel I am just resigning myself to living with the pain. I have been learning so much about how everything is all connected - particularly the nervous system since it is the sciatic nerve, the largest nerve in the body. The physical therapist I have been working with has referred to several things about the nervous system. I found this article that has helped me to understand and thought I would share it.
The Nervous System
The body is intelligently designed. Its built-in mechanisms allow the body to handle and adapt to episodic (acute) stress. The body’s sympathetic nervous system (SNS) and parasympathetic nervous system (PNS) balance each other out. The SNS is catabolic and mobilizes the body’s resources to help the body “fight or flight” threatening situations. The PNS is anabolic and helps the body rest, digest, and recover. The body is designed to spend the majority of its time in the PNS. Ideally, it only uses the SNS for true life-threatening emergencies.
However, the body interprets all stress (mental and physical) as a reason to activate the SNS. While most people are not faced with life-threatening situations on a daily basis, their bodies perceive that this is the case. Their hectic lives filled with adrenaline rushes from caffeine, too many deadlines, and rush-hour traffic trigger the SNS.
Worry and mental stress add to the physical stresses and compound the issue because the body cannot differentiate between a real or imagined stress. Thus, a person who constantly worries and thinks about stressful situations (i.e. being behind on bills, rehashing an argument at home, or layoffs at work) activates the SNS through imagination alone. Optimal recovery from exercise, and from stress in general, requires techniques to reduce the dominance of the sympathetic nervous system from physical and mental/emotional stressors and activation of the PNS.
So, this has emphasized the importance of state of mind and recovery. The physical therapy has really been invoking a lot of emotional responses as well as physical. I have been coming face to face with my fears, issues that stress me and those that make me sad..Very little of this is associated with my martial arts activities. Matter of fact, it is my martial arts activities and people that bring me joy.... make me laugh. I didn't want these things and physical pain to be haunting me the year I finally get to test for 4th degree. But, I guess this is all part of the test. As KJN has said over and over, it is the test is about as much about your state of mind as it is physical abilities.
This weekend, I am in Portland visiting my son and friends. We all went to a ropes course which was very physically challenging but fun.
In terms of my training and push ups.... I find the push ups are very beneficial for the my upper body and core.
Thursday, August 20, 2015
BKJN Pat: How many push ups and sit ups?
August 20, 2015
Today at the end of the Dragon's and Little Dragon's class, KJN Paul was telling the students about the number of push ups and sit ups we have to do as part of our training. He asked me how many I'd done since April 1st and I said " thousands" maybe 10, 000. I knew at one point I had totaled them up, but I realized I hadn't done it recently. So tonight before going to bed I went through all my blogs and came up with my totals. I hadn't added them up since May 2, 2015.
From April 1 thru August 15, 2015 I have done: ( imagine a drum roll here)
17, 734 push ups
17, 175 sit ups
My total for this year so far ( I started January 3, 2015 in the hope that I'd be ready by April ) is:
23,967 push ups
23,408 sit ups
Holy cow ! That is amazing.
Today at the end of the Dragon's and Little Dragon's class, KJN Paul was telling the students about the number of push ups and sit ups we have to do as part of our training. He asked me how many I'd done since April 1st and I said " thousands" maybe 10, 000. I knew at one point I had totaled them up, but I realized I hadn't done it recently. So tonight before going to bed I went through all my blogs and came up with my totals. I hadn't added them up since May 2, 2015.
From April 1 thru August 15, 2015 I have done: ( imagine a drum roll here)
17, 734 push ups
17, 175 sit ups
My total for this year so far ( I started January 3, 2015 in the hope that I'd be ready by April ) is:
23,967 push ups
23,408 sit ups
Holy cow ! That is amazing.
Tuesday, August 18, 2015
SBN John – Weirdo, Crazy, Nuts
Yes.
No.
Maybe.
Sure.
Who knows?
Who’s saying?
I’ve been called a lot of those things and worse.
There are
a lot of things that I do that would cause others to call me weird, crazy,
nuts, paranoid, or whatever. However, I don’t care. I do those things because I
like to, and I’m free to do so.
I love to shoot shotguns, rifles, and pistols.
I love to play paintball and shoot people in the butt. Hee
hee
I love to spar and kick people in the head. It’s really fun!
I love to run and run and run.
I love to grapple and tap people out.
I love playing violent video games, and my license plate is
my gamer tag.
I even love zombies! (See pic above after a Zombie Run 5k)
I even love zombies! (See pic above after a Zombie Run 5k)
Many people hate many of those things listed above, and they will call you names to justify their hate.
I recently read an article on how all runners use to be called
weirdo’s.
I’ve even read an article on how runners are always breaking
the law.
You can't win. Even running!
I can’t live my life trying to make everyone happy. I need
to live my life to make my family happy and myself happy. If along the way, I
make my friends, community, and everyone else happy, that’s a bonus. If not, that’s
ok.
There are even people who don’t want you to be able to defend yourself even if
you’re in danger.
However, that doesn’t make me happy. Earning my fourth degree
black belt will make me happy and
watching my daughter earn her second degree
black belt will definitely make me happy. So, after I get my belt, call me what you will, as long as
it Bu Kwan Jang Nim (Master Instructor).
Saturday, August 15, 2015
BKJN Pat: Humpty Dumpty
August 15, 2015
This was the week it was supposed to get easier. The boys went back to school and that was going to make a difference for me, give me a chance to breathe. While it's true that Gary was home to stay with the boys, knowing he was home with the boys created an urgency to return home from whatever I was doing as quickly as possible. Gary would probably disagree with that statement because there would be little evidence to support that. And he would be right. It didn't often "look" like I was trying to do more than be away as long as I could. It's more of an internal dialogue, a pressure I put on myself when I know he is at home with the boys thinking about how I am never home.
The boys went to school on Monday. True I didn't have to think about Gary being home with the boys; he was happily home alone until 2:30 pm. But if it was any easier, it wasn't readily apparent. Instead of worrying about Gary being home with the boys I was rearranging my teaching and training schedule so I could be away for a couple of days for Geoff's graduation, making sure I had all the supplies the boys needed for school before I left, forms signed or gotten to the right people to sign, and was struck with the realization of how quickly the test was approaching and how much I had yet to work on. On Tuesday I realized Gary would be gone again the following week for about a week in order to facilitate moving a relative from Florida. Although it was more than a week away, the mere thought of trying to manage everything with the boys and keep up my training, brought me to the brink of quitting. Seriously. This time I couldn't find my way. I couldn't put the pieces together and see how it would all work. It felt and seemed impossible, so I left town on Wednesday with the plan that at least for a couple of days, I wouldn't think about it at all.
I'm back home now. It was wonderful to spend some time with Geoff and see him graduate. For the two days I was in Oregon, there were no sit ups no push ups no running no bicycling no paleo diet. I wasn't breathing and sleeping test preparation. Today, I resumed my regular routine. Monday the adventure begins again with the addition now of Saturday special training.
I thought it would be easier to roll with the punches as training progressed. As I type this, I can hear KJN saying, " you didn't think this would be easy, did you? I guess at some point I did. I thought I would get the "hang of it": the ups and downs, the moments of triumph and defeat, feeling confident and strong followed by doubt and despair, adding to an already full schedule. This week I learned again about my limits. I juggle a lot to do what I do and I can't do it all. There has to be balance and I haven't found it. This Humpty Dumpty fell off the wall this week. Just as the Humpty Dumpty of nursery rhyme fame, no one can put me back together again. It's an inside job.
This week's training August 10-15, 2015
Sit ups: 800
Push ups:800
Bicycling: 14 miles
Running: 3.3 miles
Classes: 1 Black Belt, 2 Private, 1 stick
This was the week it was supposed to get easier. The boys went back to school and that was going to make a difference for me, give me a chance to breathe. While it's true that Gary was home to stay with the boys, knowing he was home with the boys created an urgency to return home from whatever I was doing as quickly as possible. Gary would probably disagree with that statement because there would be little evidence to support that. And he would be right. It didn't often "look" like I was trying to do more than be away as long as I could. It's more of an internal dialogue, a pressure I put on myself when I know he is at home with the boys thinking about how I am never home.
The boys went to school on Monday. True I didn't have to think about Gary being home with the boys; he was happily home alone until 2:30 pm. But if it was any easier, it wasn't readily apparent. Instead of worrying about Gary being home with the boys I was rearranging my teaching and training schedule so I could be away for a couple of days for Geoff's graduation, making sure I had all the supplies the boys needed for school before I left, forms signed or gotten to the right people to sign, and was struck with the realization of how quickly the test was approaching and how much I had yet to work on. On Tuesday I realized Gary would be gone again the following week for about a week in order to facilitate moving a relative from Florida. Although it was more than a week away, the mere thought of trying to manage everything with the boys and keep up my training, brought me to the brink of quitting. Seriously. This time I couldn't find my way. I couldn't put the pieces together and see how it would all work. It felt and seemed impossible, so I left town on Wednesday with the plan that at least for a couple of days, I wouldn't think about it at all.
I'm back home now. It was wonderful to spend some time with Geoff and see him graduate. For the two days I was in Oregon, there were no sit ups no push ups no running no bicycling no paleo diet. I wasn't breathing and sleeping test preparation. Today, I resumed my regular routine. Monday the adventure begins again with the addition now of Saturday special training.
I thought it would be easier to roll with the punches as training progressed. As I type this, I can hear KJN saying, " you didn't think this would be easy, did you? I guess at some point I did. I thought I would get the "hang of it": the ups and downs, the moments of triumph and defeat, feeling confident and strong followed by doubt and despair, adding to an already full schedule. This week I learned again about my limits. I juggle a lot to do what I do and I can't do it all. There has to be balance and I haven't found it. This Humpty Dumpty fell off the wall this week. Just as the Humpty Dumpty of nursery rhyme fame, no one can put me back together again. It's an inside job.
This week's training August 10-15, 2015
Sit ups: 800
Push ups:800
Bicycling: 14 miles
Running: 3.3 miles
Classes: 1 Black Belt, 2 Private, 1 stick
Sunday, August 9, 2015
SBN John - Reno 10 Miler
It’s been hard for me to train recently because of the hot
weather, lightning storms, and rain, and with all the extra workouts, I feel
heavy and sluggish. However, I still have a race to run.
I’ve signed up for the Reno 10
Miler. The Reno 10 Miler is a race that starts in downtown Reno under the famous Reno Arch. The course
then heads to UNR, and the runners get to run in and out of Mackey Stadium. We
then head back to the Truckee River and finish near the Reno arch. It’s a fun 10 miles through some
pretty areas of Reno.
A 10 mile race is becoming a
popular race distance nationally. It’s longer than a 5K or 10 K, but it’s
shorter then a half marathon. So, to perform well you need to have some
endurance, but you can also use speed. A 5K can be completed at a speedy pace
because it will be completed quickly. A half marathon needs to be completed at
a slower pace because the distance is so much longer. So, for a 10 miler race, a
balance between speed and endurance needs to be found. I know I have the
endurance. I just feel sluggish recently, and I probably won’t make a PR
(Personal Record). However, since I like to make long term goals, I’ve made a
long term goal. I think it would be cool to run the 10 miler for 10 years in a
row. This would be my third year. So, as long as I finish, I still take a step
towards my goal.
Above: Reno 10 Miler Arm Compression sleeve
Below: Reno 10 Miler picture at the finish line last year.
Saturday, August 8, 2015
BKJN Pat: My Mastery Test packet should have come with this warning: UNEXPECTED OBSTACLES AHEAD- Be prepared for sudden shifts in confidence and attitude.
August 8, 2015
No, I didn't expect this to be easy, but I sure didn't expect all the things that would come up in the course of preparing for this test. Just when I think I'm feeling strong and confident, something occurs to call that into question. This week it was something as simple as not sleeping well and the impact that had on my ability to train and keep my negative attitude in check. There are seemingly endless possibilities of bumps in the road, and you'd think by now that wouldn't surprise me or catch me off guard, but it does. I meet all the challenges, not always as well as I'd like to but I do, and yet each new one knocks me off balance, at least momentarily. I should be able to take confidence in all I've accomplished, yet I don't. And I find myself wondering why. There is more evidence to support confidence than not. I haven't given up even when I believed I couldn't do what was put before me.
I look forward to the day when I see myself in terms of what I am, what I can do rather than what I can't or I'm not. KJN Paul said from the start, this Mastery Test is really about mastering myself. That's no small task. I am a tenacious opponent.
I took a couple days off this week in order to allow myself the opportunity to get some needed rest. It helped. I do know that I have to listen closely to my body. I study homeopathy and we hold the idea that our bodies make no mistakes. They tell us perfectly what we need to know. We just have to listen and pay attention. It's when we don't listen that we get into trouble because then our bodies have to go to greater extremes to get our attention. This is not the time to face that particular obstacle so I am going to listen.
Training August 3-8 2015
Push ups: 800
Sit ups: 800
Running: 6.6 miles
Cycling: 10 miles
Classes: 2 Black Belt, 1 private, 1w/ SBN Terri
No, I didn't expect this to be easy, but I sure didn't expect all the things that would come up in the course of preparing for this test. Just when I think I'm feeling strong and confident, something occurs to call that into question. This week it was something as simple as not sleeping well and the impact that had on my ability to train and keep my negative attitude in check. There are seemingly endless possibilities of bumps in the road, and you'd think by now that wouldn't surprise me or catch me off guard, but it does. I meet all the challenges, not always as well as I'd like to but I do, and yet each new one knocks me off balance, at least momentarily. I should be able to take confidence in all I've accomplished, yet I don't. And I find myself wondering why. There is more evidence to support confidence than not. I haven't given up even when I believed I couldn't do what was put before me.
I look forward to the day when I see myself in terms of what I am, what I can do rather than what I can't or I'm not. KJN Paul said from the start, this Mastery Test is really about mastering myself. That's no small task. I am a tenacious opponent.
I took a couple days off this week in order to allow myself the opportunity to get some needed rest. It helped. I do know that I have to listen closely to my body. I study homeopathy and we hold the idea that our bodies make no mistakes. They tell us perfectly what we need to know. We just have to listen and pay attention. It's when we don't listen that we get into trouble because then our bodies have to go to greater extremes to get our attention. This is not the time to face that particular obstacle so I am going to listen.
Training August 3-8 2015
Push ups: 800
Sit ups: 800
Running: 6.6 miles
Cycling: 10 miles
Classes: 2 Black Belt, 1 private, 1w/ SBN Terri
Thursday, August 6, 2015
SBN Terri - WHAT IS IT ABOUT MARTIAL ARTS THAT KEEPS ME MOTIVATED?
I've certainly been evaluating what it is about martial arts training that keeps me going. It's always putting a goal out in front of me....something more to learn, to master ... Often it's not physical... it is the mental challenge, it is understanding the slight nuance of when to step back or position of a hand that makes all the difference. But its much more than that.
I signed my son, Erik, up for martial arts classes when he was 7 years old. About a year later, I started taking classes too. In 2005, he was a junior in high school and we tested for 3rd degree together. Now that my son is an adult in the work world, he worked on a survey of martial arts benefits and came up with these results:
I signed my son, Erik, up for martial arts classes when he was 7 years old. About a year later, I started taking classes too. In 2005, he was a junior in high school and we tested for 3rd degree together. Now that my son is an adult in the work world, he worked on a survey of martial arts benefits and came up with these results:
Percent of students who reported, recognized the following changes:
| 72% greater strength | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 59% greater endurance/stamina | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 36% better posture | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 71% more focus | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 38% speaking up for yourself | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 56% quicker reflexes | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 39% improved performance in work/school | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 53% polite greetings | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 59% better balance | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 46% more eye contact | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 57% improved motivation | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
60% more self-respect
With these changes, the following consequences were also reported:
Noteworthy Comments Made by Surey Participants:
|
Sunday, August 2, 2015
BKJN Pat: I keep expecting it to get easier
August 2, 2015
It's hard to believe this is the start of the fourth month of training. The time has passed quickly and at times I find myself in a panic over there not being enough time. It is both a long time and not a long enough time when I think about all that I still need to do.
I have recently started wearing a bracelet on which is engraved "She believed she could so she did". Through out our Mastery training, if anything should have become clear and evident to me, it's that I meet whatever challenge is put before me. Yet, there is always doubt or fear that I won't. I think it's time to leave that behind and instead of being the person who prefaces every challenge with I don't think I can, learn to embrace the person that I truly am. It is such an ingrained pattern for me that it will take time to change it. So each time I see, and therefore read the words on my bracelet, I consciously change my thoughts about me. I remember the 40 foot climb that I BELIEVED was impossible and laugh with joy at finding out it simply wasn't so.
I continue to struggle each morning with the fact that I start my day with push ups, sit ups and bicycling or running. I thought I had this issued licked by just affirming "this is what I do". No judgment in that; just a fact. That's not working so well these days. I might start out energetically on Monday but my enthusiasm quickly falls away when I haven't slept well or other stresses invade. Once I get started, I'm usually okay, but I find myself easily diverted between sets so it's actually taking me a bit longer than I'd like. I guess that's really not important. What is important is I get them done.
Training 7/27- 8/1/2015
Push ups: 1,150 ( yes I have insanely decided to do 200 a day. I only missed that once this week)
Sit ups: 1,130
Running: 3.32 miles
Bicycling: 23.2 miles
Classes: 2 Black Belt, 2 private lessons, 1 Kali
It's hard to believe this is the start of the fourth month of training. The time has passed quickly and at times I find myself in a panic over there not being enough time. It is both a long time and not a long enough time when I think about all that I still need to do.
I have recently started wearing a bracelet on which is engraved "She believed she could so she did". Through out our Mastery training, if anything should have become clear and evident to me, it's that I meet whatever challenge is put before me. Yet, there is always doubt or fear that I won't. I think it's time to leave that behind and instead of being the person who prefaces every challenge with I don't think I can, learn to embrace the person that I truly am. It is such an ingrained pattern for me that it will take time to change it. So each time I see, and therefore read the words on my bracelet, I consciously change my thoughts about me. I remember the 40 foot climb that I BELIEVED was impossible and laugh with joy at finding out it simply wasn't so.
I continue to struggle each morning with the fact that I start my day with push ups, sit ups and bicycling or running. I thought I had this issued licked by just affirming "this is what I do". No judgment in that; just a fact. That's not working so well these days. I might start out energetically on Monday but my enthusiasm quickly falls away when I haven't slept well or other stresses invade. Once I get started, I'm usually okay, but I find myself easily diverted between sets so it's actually taking me a bit longer than I'd like. I guess that's really not important. What is important is I get them done.
Training 7/27- 8/1/2015
Push ups: 1,150 ( yes I have insanely decided to do 200 a day. I only missed that once this week)
Sit ups: 1,130
Running: 3.32 miles
Bicycling: 23.2 miles
Classes: 2 Black Belt, 2 private lessons, 1 Kali
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